Humorism is a way of life

I got inspired to writing this rant, because Kotihiiri (an old (almost a year older than me!) friend) praised my blog in Facebook. (She said it was useful, since it ensures she reads something in English every now and then ^^)

This rant was originally a speech I had to write for a University course. The topic was free, as long as it was something I deemed important and interesting. Unsurprisingly, I chose humor. For your delight, here goes:

Good evening ladies and gentlemen! My topic today is humor, and I'm not kidding. You see, the funny thing about humor is that even though almost everyone is in contact with some kind of humor on daily basis, people rarely sacrifice as much as a thought to it. So, what I'm trying to do here is broaden your horizons just a little bit.

Humor is an interesting phenomenon. You see, people can be roughly divided to four different categories: there are the people who simply don't have no sense of humor whatsoever; 

the casual jokers, from here on referred to as 'jokers'; 

people who regard humor as a way of life, so called 'humorists'; 

 and there are also people who have made humor a serious business: the 'comedians'.

I can see you look confused. Or bored, I don't know. Let's have a closer look, shan't we?

First off, the non-humorists. These people are scary. Can any one of you imagine what life would be like if you couldn't lighten it up every now and then with a little joke? These people know it. They regard jokers with ill-concealed contempt, and they can barely tolerate humorists, because they believe the humorists are secretly laughing at them. 

They are usually right. Exhibit A, straight from the internets:

Under this post, someone launched into a tirade about how people like the creator of the caption destroy English language, completely missing the joke. This being the Internet, it resulted into people making fun of the tirader, using gradually worsening grammar and spelling.

Non-humorists also mostly despise the comedians, who they see as leeches, making their money from a source that should be free. That, and they don't really get the joke. The non-humorists often avoid all kinds of parties and other such happenings like the plague. I'm not saying they would be invited all too often, mind you. Other optional names for them include, but are not limited to, 'buzzkill', 'party-pooper' and 'up-tight s.o.b.'

What about casual jokers, then? Well, the vast majority of people falls under this category. They enjoy a joke every now and then as a method of relaxation, like a glass of fine wine. Sadly, not all joker-made jokes are that fine. Most of derogatory or vulgar jokes are created by jokers. 

Since I am such a delightfully wonderful human being, I brought you an example! Behold, exhibit B.

 What's funnier than a dead baby?

-A dead baby in a clown suit.

I could go on about dead baby comedy a lot, but I'll spare you. It's usually quite offensive to many, and not that funny anyway.

Jokers usually get along with both humorists and non-humorists, even though they often see the first as shallow and the latter as uptight.

Next group, humorists. You all have met humorists, I am sure. It is easy to recognize a humorist. There seems to be a perpetual half-smile, or at least a, well, humorous twinkle in the corner of their eye, as if they were laughing at a joke no-one else quite gets. And, they usually are. Despite their apparent shallowness, humorism is their religion or life philosophy, and they really don't take it lightly. It comes from a deep realization, or 'enlightenment', such as 'Life is a joke. You are either part of the audience, or you're part of the joke', 'You have to be a bit insane to avoid going crazy', or 'This world went to hell a long, long time ago. There's nothing I can do for it, so just enjoy the ride.'

The humorists usually get along with most of people, since people are so amusing. They are, as I mentioned earlier, often seen as shallow, right until the moment they give a shockingly deep, insightful and humorous comment on the matter at hand. The situations where a humorist is intentionally rude or insulting are few and far between. However, they end up insulting, sometimes even hurting people because the target audience misses the point of a joke. 

An example, consider it, if you may, exhibit C. For instance, a humorist may ask someone 'who died and made you the boss?' when someone tells him or her to do something at a funeral. It is, however, pointless to get mad at a humorist. After all, if you're not the one laughing, the joke's probably on you.

This reminds me of a funny story a kobold bard told me the other day!

  Once upon a time, there was a king.

The king ruled over a small kingdom he had inherited from his father.

The king was not a particularly bad ruler, considering.

However, one of the dukedoms his late father had conquered, started to plot against him, in order to liberate themselves from his kingdom.

The king naturally had spies in the rebellious duke's castle, and so he soon found out about their plans. And he had the duke brought to him to be questioned.

Naturally, the duke denied all knowledge.

So the king, sighing heavily, summoned the royal torturer, and told him to cut the duke's toes off.

After the torturer has done as told, the king started to question the duke again.

And again, the duke told the king he did not know what he was talking about.

So the torturer cut the duke's fingers off.

And again the king asked the duke about the rebellion planned.

And again the duke told him he knew naught about it.

So the torturer cut away his ears (Nothing), removed his nose (I know nothing), and gouged out his eyes (I do not know what you are talking about, your highness).

Amazed and taken by the duke's courage, the king told the torturer to end the duke's suffering.

The torturer picked up his wide, heavy axe, lifted it high, aimed and swung towards the duke's neck. 

Yet, right as he started the swing, the count screamed "No! Wait! I'll talk!"

Of course, by then it was too late, and the torturer took his head clean off. 

Moral of the story: Don't kill your count before he chickens.

And last but definitely not the least, the comedians. These people, as I said before, have made humor a serious business. They are stand-up comedians, politicians, actors, directors and whatnot.

Contrary to the popular belief, not all comedians are humorists, just as not all humorists are comedians. Following the path of humorism definitely helps, however, if you're trying to make a living by amusing the audience.

That's all folks. In case you deem the whole topic uninteresting and irrelevant, please, try to at least remember this last sentence, which pretty much sums the whole topic up: Humor is a funny thing.

As always, if you have something to say about the subject, didn't understand something, or want to tell me how utterly wrong I am, please leave me a comment!

About Stupid People

It hasn't got anything to do with the subject, I just relate to it.

Yeah, I promised to post this rant a week ago, I know. I just haven't been on the mood. (It's not like anyone reads these anyway.)

So, yeah, as promised, I'll talk a bit about stupid people. This may come as a surprise to a lot of people that know me, but I don't hate stupid people. I don't even vaguely dislike stupid people.

You see, stupidity, as I understand it, is not something you choose. Kinda like left- or righthandedness, or sexual orientation, you come pre-equipped with certain amount of mental capabilities. So, people who possess less brain power than you (or in my case, I) do, can not help it. Nothing there to hate. Another thing it has in common with handedness and sexuality is that it is not something to mock people for.

Nor should the stupid people be pitied. In my opinion, if you ever come across a person you perceive as more stupid than yourself, you should take a bit of responsibility of teaching them (yes, I'm using singular 'they' as a gender-neutral pronoun. Sue me.) stuff. You know, broadening their horizons. It can be very frustrating at times, but when you see their face light up with a realization and hear those four little words ("I get it now") it is oh, so rewarding!

So, yeah. I don't hate on stupid people. What I do hate, however, is people who are not stupid, but act like they are. I guess I call those people 'ignorant'. It's a handy word. It stands for someone who doesn't know (something or anything about a subject), yet it contains just a hint of ignoring (the subject). These people do possess the ability to know and to understand, yet for some reason or other, they choose not to.

Since I don't want to be one of those people, I've tried - really tried - to understand these people, but to no avail. It might just be my curious, inquisitive nature, but I just can't wrap my head around the concept of a person not wanting to understand something they (often quite easily) could. Similarly unfathomable is the possibility of not wanting to learn or to know about stuff.

In case someone I know IRL happens to read this blog: yes, I have quite recently learned I don't need to know everything. That does not change the fact I want to know everything!