Yeah, if you hadn't guessed, I have been keeping busy, what with neglecting the schoolwork and all, I'm sure you know the drill by now. But, certain people have been slightly pressuring me to post (if you recognize yourself, feel free to feel a sting in your dark heart). So, here's a little update on me life, with a bit of rant included.
First off, exes. In case you somehow didn't know, I got three of 'em. One (Lily) is my classmate and tries her best not to acknowledge my existence. Other (I call her BB) is so far in my past I barely even remember us. And the third one (Q) is my best friend.
Yeah, about the first (well, chronologically second, but does it really matter?) one. When this semester started, we had a brief chat about how we are both quite awesome individuals and we want to stay pals. Well, guess what? So far, that was the last time we've talked, as far as I can remember. Although I do have my own theories of the causes, her complete and utter lack of acknowledgement makes me feel bad.
Don't get me wrong, I don't miss her. Actually, let me rephrase that. I don't miss our relationship. I do, however, kinda miss the times before that. We shared a number of laughs, and out of all of my classmates, she was the one I felt most connected with.
About the second... She's history, our history is history, all that. However, she's coming to our school next January. Although she's in a different degree program, and it is highly unlikely that we'll have anything to do with each other, being aware that I'll be seeing her around every now and then kinda makes me feel funny in my tummy. There's a reason for that, though. Y'see, I rarely really open my heart to anyone. (If you think you know me just because you read my blog, keep dreaming.)
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| It also applies to blogging. |
And the third. Oh, my, where should I begin? With a clarification, I guess. For anyone doubting, I'm over her. What pisses me off, is that apparently there are certain people who don't believe it. And these people can't keep their mouths shut, but make sure they voice their opinions to Q. For instance, her female best friend A, and their mutual friend F. (Do you see what I did there?)
What's the problem with it, you ask? Well, y'see, Q is what you might call malleable. And if many enough people tell her that I possibly can't have gotten over her this easy, and still be in such good terms with her, and yadda yadda, she might start believing it. And there is no chance it won't affect our relationship. Which is in equal parts terrifying and pissing me off.
Secondly, I feel like I'm bi-polar. (I'm actually bi- many things! Lingual, for instance.) Why? Well, because I feel like I've been running on a turbo-drive for a while, and now I'm slowly but surely going to crash and burn. (AKA heading towards the depressive phase.) Don't worry, dear readers! I'm taking a healthy and adult stance on it!
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| Rayne Summers, the psychopathic manchild to end all psychopatic manchildren. |
Well, what were you expecting? I can't afford to break down. I got a school to go to, a job to do, jokes to crack... y'know, life to live.
Thirdly, I had an insect dream last night. (You know, the one where there are insects crawling all over you?) It creeped me out good, and I slept maybe four hours during the whole night. After waking up, I tiptoed (because the floor felt like there were insects there) to bathroom and took a fifteen-minute searing hot shower. My skin no longer feels like it's crawling.
The funny thing is that last time I had dreams like that was after my nose job, when I was quitting painkillers again. Except this time it can't be withdrawal, since I have barely been eating the medicine I'm supposed to, much less ones I'm not.
Fourthly, Q's little sister, QT, asked for a shout-out. Here's for you, kid! You're a great person and I wish you the best of luck in Oulu!
More coming sometime next month. Stay tuned!
