Today's post is actually a quest post. This one is brought to you from a friend, who's not afraid to use his own name in the treacherous world of Internets. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Jouni Hakkarainen.
(The translation from Finnish is mine, so any mistakes can be attributed to it.)
"What ama-ama-amazes me today is a single person's numerous and various roles. I'm not sure if I have mumbled about this earlier, but here goes with new thoughts and perspectives!
One interesting perspective in observing an individual's roles is age. [Girlfriend] just told me she had talked with her pal on the advent of coming of age, that "lol, we're soon like adults". Adulthood is an interesting concept, one people in their youth think either admiringly or abhorringly. Michael Monroe gets it spot on: "They say that youth is often wasted on the young." Only the contrast given by old age truly teaches to respect the freedom and ease of childhood.
The amazing country song by Chuck Wicks paints a picture of family roles, first and foremost. Why is it considered such a big deal, taking your partner to meet your parents for the first time? Is it big, because you normally don't tell anything pointless or extraneous about your own life? Is the introduction to parents so remarkable because it's done despite being awkward for everyone: The partner being introduced, the child who has done their choice, and the parents, who can't deal with the situation, or don't know what's good to say, and what should be left unsaid? Most likely all of the above, but one reason is, that when meeting his parents, a child is always... a child of their parents. When I was writing this, I wondered how I could describe an adult human being's relationship with their parents, but child is the only word that springs to mind.
I've also seen this myself. Being an adult is most difficult at home. At the university, I'm at least a thinking individual, and at work I'm even a salary-earning man, but when I'm home, I'm a child. When my father or mother give me advice for life, I humbly listen and may even ask for advice myself. Likewise, irritation is much stronger in domestic conditions. Many people say, that no matter how businesslike or sober they may be in their day-to-day lives, at home they often quarrel and row. At home, no-one believes the bullshit about you being an adult. You're a child, and you'll stay a child. When you're ready to take your partner to this setting, you put yourself in a vulnerable situation. Vulnerability is important in a relationship, because it's not enough to just have fun. There are certain things separating a romantic relationship from a friendship.
Another important role people have is the role among peers: The friends, that are of same age, and thus technically in the same situation. I'm lucky, because I'm still quite actively in touch with at least five friends, who were my friends already in primary school. Thank you all! Especially with long-time friends like these, a person shares a certain kind of a mirror role, because these people have seen you in many different situations. With these people you have grown, and been a child, youngster, adult, stupid, foolish, smart, seeking yourself, and wise.
In addition to the contemporary peers, a person creates their role according to their age. The legendary thirty years crisis is the time, when person is sort of forced to consider, what they have achieved in life and what still needs to be achieved. A thirty-year-old may, having played certain cards, be a college graduate, in a permanent employment and a long-time relationship, possibly even with children of their own. On the other hand, I don't feel that a person not having these so-called achievements in 30-year age, would have anything to be ashamed or sad of: As long as life is meaningful, it's also good, and it's definitely not a bad thing to have goals and happy things not yet experienced at thirty years of age... not that the person I described before wouldn't!
A day in a person's life, going through different roles, is very interesting. It's not at all impossible to wake up as a spouse, travel to work using public transport as a paying customer and a neverheard just sitting around, working as a trusted subordinate, employee, taxpayer and a work mate, goes to a lecture as an ignorant student, meets their acquaintances as a dear friend, eats out as a mouth to be fed and a customer to be served, returns home as a worn-out parent, and finally falls to bed again as a loved spouse.
And, finally, here goes something:
"
